Friday, 12 August 2016

Advices about fatherhood, from the Ticklers

On my way back to work, I stopped at the Ticklers' place (even though they are not sisters, they are inseparable), because my wife was there in a visit and apparently the girls were missing me. They are on holiday and had spent the afternoon chatting to my wife about what we should and especially what I should do when the little cub wolf we are going to have is here (it could be any time now). They gave me a few rules that they said I really need to get by if I want to be a good father and raise Wolfie properly. I suggested they write down the list, which they said they would do. But until then, I thought I would share them here with you:

-Apparently, I should not swear, ever. Not in French, not in English, so Wolfie does not learn rude words.
-I should not drink anymore either, so as not to give him a bad example and also to avoid any dangerous situation.
-I should not tell him scary stories. But for the Ticklers, I can still tell them scary stories. Only, I should not tell them to my son as not to scare him, not until he reaches a certain age. (Oh, and they find Lufsig "the most horrible plush toy you could ever find" as "he eats people").
-I have to make sure my socks are not worn out. I cannot remember the word they used, but apparently, it is necessary that I set good examples regarding the socks I wear and their tending.

Failure to break these rules and a few others means that I will get slapped on the wrist by them and maybe pull a few hairs out if I really misbehave. Otherwise, they agreed my wife and I will make great parents and they said: "We think Wolfie is gonna be epic." They love the word epic. I wonder what an epic son is supposed to be like, but I think this deserves to be a new great unknown line.

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