Ottawa miseries

I am in Ottawa for the day visiting my brother. This is an unusual event. Ottawa has a poor reputation among Quebeckers, maybe among other Canadians too, it is supposed to be boring, strange and well, foreign. I have to say I share these feelings. An old drinking buddy of mine, who was working in the stage business, told me once: "I am back from Ottawa, the capital of Romania". This is funny enough to make it a great unknown line, and it is almost true. It certainly feels just as foreign, just as far away, even though you just need to cross the Ottawa river and you are in Québec. It might as well be an ocean. As I mentioned here, Ottawa looks and feels more like England actually, a very austere, very cold, very monarchist, very old-fashioned English city.

In Montreal, my bag got searched before I got in the bus. I was forgetting that I was going in the capital city, hence a potential terrorist target.  I found it excessive: people move in and out of the city every day by various means of transport, what was the point of this vigilance? It was not exactly as if I was going in another country. Well, I was, in a way. I will try to rediscover the place and see it in a positive light. In a few minutes. But I cannot help feeling that I am in Romania.

Question existentielle (106)

Je suis à Ottawa aujourd'hui et je me pose cette question:

-Pourquoi est-ce qu'Ottawa est aussi ennuyeuse et austère?

Dinnertime conversation topics

Yesterday, my brother and a colleague and friend decided to have dinner in a restaurant, and they invited me to go with them. I was planning to have my bagel with smoked salmon, but I decided to have this treat another day and enjoy an evening out and a bit of socialising. So I ate with them in an Italian restaurant on Papineau. My brother's friend is a literature teacher, so it allowed me to chat about literature a bit. It is always pleasant to use some of my old academic skills. She was preparing a course on Racine's Phèdre. I once gave a course on this very play, one that I was really proud of, so I gave her a few tips/perspective. I miss teaching literature a lot, so it was a bittersweet moment. And I learned againm for the second time in two weeks, that I have a distinctive, strong Saguenay accent (and much stronger than my bro, mwa ha ha). Which is both pleasant and reassuring.

En direct d'Ottawa (aaargghhh!)

J'écris ces lignes du bureau de petit frère, donc d'Ottawa. C'est la première fois que je lui rends visite et c'est la première fois depuis 2007 que je me rends à Ottawa. Une ville que j'aime assez peu: c'est comme une ville anglaise, sans le cachet ou l'authenticité. En fait, Ottawa m'a toujours donné l'impression d'être plus anglaise que canadienne, mais une Angleterre profondément quétaine. J'étais même un peu étonné de voir le sens du trafic. Bon, je suis sûr qu'il y a des coins sympathiques, je suis heureux de voir mon frère et de découvrir son chez-soi pour la première fois, mais la ville elle-même est exactement comme je m'en rappelais. Elle est austère comme bien des capitales, monarchiste, pas tant laide que beige.

Back in bleak Montreal

Since midday today, I am back in Montreal. Do not get me wrong: Montreal is by far my favourite place to live in Québec and maybe in the world. But let's face it: by this time of year, with this kind of winter, it looks rather bleak. The weather is not cold, it is around zero, but it does not look nice, it is a cocktail of dirty snow, grey ice and slush. And it is quite wet. I have to say, I do prefer sometimes colder temperatures. That said, some people keep the morale up even when it looks bleak outside: in the taxi that took me from the station to the flat, the Haitian driver ewas singing along enthusiastically the créole songs that were being aired on his radio. I thought it was an interesting picture of Montreal's daily life. I haven't seen many taxi drivers smiling, let alone singing, in rainy grey England. Granted, not every taxi driver here are as cheerful as this one, but still. That's why I prefer Haitian taxi drivers over the others: they are most of the time friendly and cheerful (besides I have family bonds with their homeland). That improvised performance was worth the ride and it certainly brighten my day.

Oh and on a side note, bleak or not, Montreal has character.

Chicoutimi-Montréal

Je suis de retour à Montréal depuis ce midi. J'ai pris l'autobus à Chicoutimi très tôt (06:30AM) pour me rendre ici. C'est vraiment le jour et la nuit entre Montréal et Chicoutimi. Il avait neigé à Chicout (notez le diminutif), donc  tout était d'un blanc ouateux et le parc était superbe (malheureusement je n'ai pas vu grand-chose parce que j'ai dormi jusqu'à Québec). Ici, ce qui domine c'est le cocktail habituel de vieille neige grise, de glace et de slush. À Montréal, c'es tle règne de la slush.

An expat from Saguenay

"I travel a lot
I see a lot of things
very different from what we are used to see here
of course
when we travel we see different things
that's quite sure
but I have the feeling to tell it to repeat it
why
I don't really know
maybe saying it I just want to make a contact
to keep in touch as we say"

Larry Tremblay, The Dragonfly of Chicoutimi

I quoted it before, but I do feel like the way Gaston Talbot describe himself in the beginning of the play (we learn later that it is a fabrication, but it fits me anyway). And today is my last day home, in Saguenay, in Chicoutimi where the water is deep.I always have this strange feeling when I come back home. I am a guy from Saguenay, a Blueberry as we say, through and through: I sitll have the accent, I relate to all these little cultural references. I also have the local temperament, or some of it: the pride, the tendency to fabulation, the way of always looking at things in dramatic, larger than life fashion. The Saguenay is often called the Kingdom of Saguenay (I kid you not), even though there is no king in it. But there is no need of a king: the place has enough majesty in itself. It might sound stupid, but I relate to this.

I have been an expat for a long time, maybe since I first left to study in Montreal when I was 19. I wondered before if being an expat did not mean becoming a foreigner. I am foreign wherever I go: in other countries of course, but even in Montreal which I consider home, because of my accent. Yet when I come back here, it is always after a long while: I didn't see the city changing, or the way I changed myself. In a way, I feel that I am from Saguenay when I am in another place.

Anecdote saguenéenne

Mon père et moi sommes allés Chez Georges Steak House avant-hier. Pour moi, c'était la première fois en cinq ans, au moins. C'était donc un arrêt obligé. Pour fair tune histoire courte (car ceci est le préambule), j'ai commandé comme dessert une pointe de tarte aux biscuits Graham (un incontournable). J'ai reçu un quart de tarte. Même à deux, on n'a pas pu la finir. Ca illustre bien je crois, notre sens de l'abondance et de la grandeur. Au Saguenay, rien n'est petit, même les pointes de tartes.

Food for the hungry expat

My English readers will have recognised on the picture on the left a sheperd's pie/cottage pie. It is, but not quite. In fact, it is a pâté chinois (literally a Chinese pie), the Québec version of the dish. And no, it is not the same. Seriously, it is not. The single difference is that we add sweet corn (creamed corn in this case, which I prefer, the other corn imakes it too dry). I said single difference, but the creamed corn is the little thing that makes ALL the difference here, it turns the pie from a borrowed English dish into something Quebecker, and quite different in terms of taste.. On the side, we have beetroots, to add to the exotism (well, to my non-Quebec readers, the exotism, for Quebeckers there is nothing more plain than a pâté chinois).

So I had this on my first supper in Chicoutimi. With a slice of chocolate cake. I don't think I ever ate one that was that good. When you are homesick, this is what I dream of. And tonightwe eat tourtière. I will blog more about it, and the experience.

Nature morte hivernale

Ceci est la photo d'un pommier dans la cour-arrière de mes parents. Elle serait parfaite si on ne voyait pas en arrière-plan la maison de nos voisins, qui est franchement horrible (le développement domiciliaire à Chicoutimi dans les années 70-80, ça allait n'importe comment).

J'ai pris cette photo et décidé de la publier ici parce que: 1)c'est un coin de la cour-arrière que l'on n'a pas vu sur le blogue, enfin je ne crois pas et certainement pas en hiver, parce qu'alors le coin est difficile d'accès et 2)parce que je trouve l'image une intéressante petite Nature morte. Les pommes de l'automne dernier qui sont figées sur le pommier autrement entièrement nu, les cèdres en arière-plan (lesquels cachent en partie l'horreur qu'est la maison des voisins), la neige. Ce n'était pas une journée très froide, mais on ne le dirait pas à voir la photo. En un sens, je vois cette photo comme les restes de l'automne sur un hiver.

Self-portrait (sort of) and snow

This is a picture of my  feet and legs, in the snow, taken two days ago in the back garden of the family house, where I had decided to walk, just so I could have my feet in a lot of snow. It felt great, walking deep in the snow and listening to the sound of my steps. This is one of those little nothings that make life: a self-portrait of me at home.

Question existentielle (105)

On m'a souvent dit que Chicoutimi, on en fait vite le tour. Je le pense un peu aussi, parfois. D'où ma question existentielle d'aujourd'hui:

-Quoi faire à Chicoutimi?

Getting older

I went to buy some after-shave yesterday, as 1)my stocks were low and 2)I prefer to buy Dans un Jardin products. So I bought two bottles of after-shave so it can last longer and I also received as an extra a free sample of anti-wrinkle eye-care. It kind of shocked me. Wel, not kind of, it absolutely did. It is the very first time someone ever offered me anti-wrinkle products. I was tempted to refuse. Instead, I turned it into a joke and decided to share my pain. I turned over to mum and said: "Well, just so you know your eldest son now uses anti-wrinkle cream". It is a great unknown line, it is also a bit cruel. But it also shows that one never gets older alone.

Des nouvelles du bout du monde

Je blogue plus irrégulièrement ces temps-ci, le retour au bercail me gardant plus occupé que je pensais. Cela dit, je vais essayer d'écrire plus.

Je suis donc à Chicoutimi, que je considère comme le bout du monde. C'est sans doute exagéré, mais l'exagération est typiquement saguenéenne, donc parler de Chicoutimi comme le bout du monde est somme toute assez appropriée: c'est loin, , une grande ville perdue dans la nature, dans un coin qui parfois peut paraître rébarbatif, surtout quand il fait froid comme aujourd'hui.

Je dis que je suis occupé, mais en fait pas beaucoup, à part être dans la ville et essayer de vivre comme un local en congé, je ne suis pas particulièrement occupé. Hier je suis allé à Place du Royaume. Signe de notre esprit d'exagération bien saguenéen: on appelle la région le Royaume, et donc, par conséquent, une centre d'achat tout ce qu'il y a de plus centre d'achat, gros, laid et sans personnalité, s'appelle Place du Royaume. Cela dit, le service à la clientèle est en général meilleur qu'en Angleterre. C'est toujours ça de pris.

Versatile Blog Award

I have been tagged and received a Blog Award from Tao Owl here. So first I wish to thank Tao.Owl for thinking about me and be generous enough to think that 1)there are 7 interesting random facts about me worthy of knowing and 2)I know 15 bloggers to send this award to.

Below are the rules of the award:

1.) Thank the person that nominated you, and give a shout out on your blog to them with a link to theirs.
2.) Share 7 random facts about yourself.
3.) Send the blog award to 15 other bloggers who's blog you love and appreciate, and let them know they won the award.


Let's get started with the seven random facts about me:

1)For some unknown reason, I have some ginger hair in my beard.

2)I prefer to wear black coats. My Kanuk coat is black, my summer coat is black and so is my Berghaus. My Liverpool coat to and my old Timberland one. I had coats of other colours, but I prefer black and find them more comfortable.

3)Talking about clothes, I always wear the same set of clothes when I travel.Well, two sets really, one for warm/hot weather and one for cold one.

4)I prefer to play the Colonel Mustard at Clue/Cluedo.In fact I prefer to use yellow pieces in board games.

5)As a child with my brothers, I used to "extend" some board games, such as Cluedo and Scotland Yard, into make belief. "live action" games. We improvised murder parties too.

6)I have an accent from Saguenay, which is very distinctive, even among Quebeckers It may not sound like much, but after years away and abroad, it feels great when someone tells me. A friend told me last Monday, just after I said a few words.

7)I am naturally a shy person, which I compensate by opening my mouth a bit too often and too loudly for my own good sometimes.

So now here are the 15 (fifteen!) bloggers/blogs I give this award to:

1)Gwen Buchanan

2)Mozart's Girl

3)Wendy the (Very Good) Witch

4)The Gill-Man

5)The Frog Queen

6)Halloween Spirit

7)Voodoo Ghoul

8)Loulou

9)Cynthia 

10)Estelle

11)Prof Solitaire

12)October Farm

13)PJ

14)Devadar

15)Jazz

I cannot wait to read about your seven random facts. Especially since I swept tears and blood to write this post.

Une heure aux Bouquinistes

Petit arrêt obligé lorsque je viens à Chicoutimi: je passe au moins une petite heure à la librairie Les Bouquinistes. J'en ai déjà parlé ici et ici. C'est un de mes commerces préférés à Chicoutimi. J'ai expliqué dans mes deux billets de nostalgie chicoutimienne pourquoi je m'en ennuyais. J'y ai notamment acheté Arvida. Je demanderai au cousin une dédicace lorsque je serai de retour à Montréal.

Puisque j'étais ma mère, on sait maintenant aux Bouquinistes que je suis le fils de celle-ci et le cousin de l'auteur du bestseller. C'est un peu étrange: j'ai été un client anonyme pendant des décennies, de mon enfance à l'âge adulte. Maintenant je suis presque un notable.

A walk in the snow

I had my very first proper walk in the snow today. Just a few minutes in the morning, but still. When I was walking in the drizzling English rain I looked like an otter, today with my black Kanuk coat I looked like a black bear in the snow. It was a short but nice experience: the smell of the snow and cold air, that gets on the clothes, the slight cracking of the snow underneath my feet, the immaculate white coat all around me. Proper snow and proper winter time. This is one good thing about going where the water is deep: Montreal is mainly icy, but Chicoutimi has a real winter.

Question existentielle (104)

Une question existentielle directement inspirée de ce billet:

-Est-ce qu'un expatrié ne devient pas de facto un étranger en son pays?

Where the water is deep

"Chicoutimi is an Amerindian word
it means up to where the water is deep
this word refers to the Saguenay
a big a beautiful a splendid river
but Chicoutimi as a town is ugly
as every American town
and this ugliness is very interesting
but fortunately nature surrounds every town
in this country
and nature cannot be ugly"

Larry Tremblay, The Dragonfly of Chicoutimi

I have quoted Larry Tremblay before, this very quote in fact, but it fits the topic of this post. I am in Chicoutimi, where I grew up, where indeed I spent the first 20 years of my life or so. I had a glimpse of the Saguenay, this beautiful, splendid river, and a lot of the ugliness of the town. It didn't change much. I can say that Chicoutimi is ugly without being considered a traitor, I hope, as this ugliness has now been immortalised in a major play. And because ugliness can be interesting.

I always come back here with an uneasy feeling. Chicoutimi, as I mentioned here in French, has a fitting name: it is deep, far away from everywhere, surrounded by forest and nature, the Saguenay river with its deep, deep water, and it affected our psyche: we are as insular as English people, if not more. I wonder if being an expat does not mean, also, becoming a foreigner. I will come back to it in the next days.

Ici l'eau est profonde

Je suis de retour à Chicoutimi depuis aujourd'hui/hier. Je dis aujourd'hui/hier parce que mon blogue fonctionne à l'heure anglaise. Donc, me voici là où l'eau est profonde, comme le dit la chanson.Je me sens vraiment là où l'eau est profonde, même si j'ai à peine vu le Saguenay depuis mon retour.Mais c'est très profond de bien des façons, Chicoutimi. Hier/avant-hier, un ami avec qui j'ai pris un verre (au Boudoir) m'a dit que j'avais gardé mon accent saguenéen, en fait qu'il était très prononcé, ce qui m'a bien fait plaisir. C'était plaisant. Cela dit, je me demande si je suis capable de passer pour un "local". Un expatrié ne devient-il pas un peu étranger en son pays, de facto? J'en ai discuté avec mon ami, d'ailleurs. J'en ferai peut-être une question existentielle.